top of page
  • Doily Allergen

Standing Out: This UI Junior Just Slapped A Bunch Of Fucking Laptop Stickers All Over Her Resume


stickers on resume

For months, Kira Benson struggled to make her resume stand out.


She carefully crafted a list of skills and qualifications. She mentioned her volunteer work for the Special Olympics. She even inserted a bit of wry humor in the summary section to convey a warm, confident personality.


Yet, these efforts seemed pointless when she got the same effect by slapping a bunch of random fucking laptop stickers all over her resume.


“There’s just no other way I can communicate to potential employers that I believe ‘Coffee Is Life’ or that Colorado is a state I often visit,” Benson said. “Reading my work experience section, you might get the sense that I’m an open-minded and creative problem solver. But there’s simply no denying it when you see the ‘Coexist’ logo right on the front page. God, this Tumblr sticker says more than I ever could about the writing skills I gained as an independent blogger.”


Finally, after weeks of self-evaluation, Benson has found a way to convey her distinct skill-set through dozens of mass produced stickers meant for skateboard helmets and water bottles.


“A cute little Volkswagen Van that says ‘Travel. Explore. Get Lost.’ clearly demonstrates that I’ve had a well-rounded work history,” Benson said. “As an English major, they’d never guess that I know quite a bit about earth and climate science. Luckily, I got this fucking sweet NASA sticker, and it’s going right in my ‘hobbies and interests’ section. Look out boring old text noting my Spanish Minor and study abroad trip to Barcelona! You’re getting covered up with this adorable cartoon taco.”


Benson isn’t sure where her professional life will lead her, but she’ll be turning heads and wowing employers everywhere with cool band decals like The Arctic Monkeys and the Blink-182 partially covering her contact information.

Comments


Featured Articles

bottom of page