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Student Caught Cheating on Finals Claims He Was “Doing a Bit”


student shrugging

Local junior Nathan Bobathan is in hot water after being caught cheating on his Gender Studies final. If found guilty of academic dishonesty, Bobathan faces possible expulsion. Bobathan has offered a confounding self defense.


“I was just doing a bit!” Bobathan claims. “Just having a laugh really.”


Bobathan claims he sought to hold a mirror up to the triviality of standardized testing by copying every answer off his classmate the next seat over.


“It was satire, really,” Bobathan says. “You know, like that one humor magazine we have on campus. You guys know what I’m talking about, right? Doily something or other. All the writers are total virgins, but still it’s funny stuff.”


When faculty explained to Bobathan that satire requires a clarity of purpose and target lest it be mistaken for and contribute to that which it intends to criticize, Bobathan said his satire is more post-modern, even dada-esque.


“It makes sense they didn’t get it,” Bobathan says. “My work is pretty out there. I take a surrealist approach to my comedy that gets lost on the masses. If I wanted to entertain Joe Schmoe, I’d craft an actual joke, but that just seems so antiquated.”


University faculty say they plan to throw the book at Bobathan and are quote “gonna enjoy it”.

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