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O-DEI-ssey
“Muse, tell me about a complicated man” begins one of the newest translations of Homer’s Odyssey —a version that, according to the...

“This is Perfect!” Local Noise Rock Artist Samples Mayflower Elevator Scraping Noise
“RYM’s Gonna Love This!”

Dear The Onion: Get Your Own Ideas
Dear The Onion, Isn’t this weird? Usually we’re the ones receiving questions in Dear Doily, but since you don’t have any sort of cool...

Barb Wilson Signs Executive Order Renaming UI to University of America
In what sources on the Board of Regents are calling a “patriotic” and “long overdue” move, University of Iowa President Barbara Wilson...

Herky Sees His Shadow: Six More Weeks of Midterms Predicted
The University of Iowa celebrated Groundhog Day this year with the school’s favorite tradition: pulling Herky out of a hole in the ground...

Student Spotlight: Kid Whose Jean Cuffs are Full of Slush
The end of winter is approaching, which every midwesterner knows is the beginning of slush season. As part of a university research trial...


Devil on Your Shoulder Says You Don’t Need That Coat
Iowa winters are something every student who has been here in January has become quickly familiar with. Snow, ice, and blistering wind...

Iowa River Freezes Over, Trapping The Creature Beneath
Climate Reports Indicate This Annual Tradition Could Soon Become a Rare Occurrence Ah, winter. The time of pretty snow, disgusting slush,...

Purple Heart Awarded to Cambus Driver on Snowy Day
The West Campus Transportation Center was inhabited for the very first time this week for a Purple Heart Ceremony, where the medal was...


Presidential Inauguration Over: Biden Officially Kicked Out of the Polycule
As the number one most reliable source of news in the entire country, The Doily Allergen had the immense displeasure of being invited to...

We Sent A Lone Gay Into A Gender & Sexuality Class
Why Are There Only Cishets in Those Classes? With Sylly Week finally over, one of our reporters felt they had enough information to...

YAF D&D Group Reunites After Break Hiatus
Casting “Sleep” on the Woke Left Wizards and witches (and NOBODY in between), rejoice! Your favorite tabletop gaming scene hasn’t gone...

Celebrate Your First Day of Classes by Celebrating Tessa’s Birthday
Are you miserably sobbing your way through your first day of classes, hoping and yearning for even a single spark of good on this most...


Supreme Court Hears Ruling to Silence The Doily Allergen
The United States Supreme Court has called The Doily Allergen to Washington for speaking truth and fact far too often. The University of...

13 Reasons Why You Should Lock In
It’s that magical time of year when even the smallest things going wrong can have you telling all your friends (or at least Yik Yak),...

Before Finals Week Starts, Does Anyone Wanna Admit They Have A Crush on Us?
Be Honest 🫣 Ah, Dead Week: The point in the semester where everyone’s on the verge of collapse getting ready for finals, and classes...

Former Tippie Student Passes Away
RIP Mr. Business major :(((


Idiot Tree Still Thinks It’s Summer
BREAKING: This idiot tree apparently still thinks it’s summer. Look at all that green! Don’t you have some leaves to lose? Spoiler alert:...

Hundreds of Local Four-Eyes Face Homelessness Due to Police Raids, Rising Prescription Costs
Since the election of Donald Trump as the 47th President of the United States, Iowa has been cracking down on four-eyes across the state...

Herky Saves the Town
You Heard Right! In a thrilling turn of events, beloved University of Iowa mascot, Herky the Hawk, saves Iowa City from imminent...
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